I have 8 more days until my surgery, Frankly, I’m a little nervous about the whole thing. I don’t like the whole blood clotting issue. I have #FactorVLeiden and #LupusAnticoagulant. Then, there’s the #primaryimmunodeficiency. I’m trying to think positive. I think that in my case, this would be a little easier to deal with if I wasn’t a nurse. In some cases, ignorance is bliss. I know the surgeon was a little freaked out, but thankfully agreed to remove the gallbladder. The first surgeon refused and no amount of cajoling could change his mind. I think that’s what has me a little nervous.
I’ve been thinking about my best memories a lot lately. One that came to mind was when I was swimming in the lake with my then boyfriend and, he asked me how does one pick out a horse. I laughed and told him that you don’t really pick out a horse. They pick you.
As soon as the words were spoken, out of no where, I heard a loud whinny and this horse comes running through the yard and right to the lake where he stood neighing and tossing his beautiful head. He was a gray dapple. My boyfriend remained, swimming in place, with his mouth hanging open. I swam to the dock and went to the horse. He was very friendly. I looked him over for a brand, a tattoo, anything to identify him, but saw nothing. I walked up to the cabin to change out of my bathing suit and into something more horse-friendly. my boyfriend started making calls to figure out who may have lost a horse.
I had an hour of pure bliss with the stray horse before we figured out where he belonged. He was from the neighboring farm. He must have gotten out through the gate which someone had left open. I walked him back to the farm with my boyfriend following behind on a four-wheeler, steadily bitching about the flies flying around the horse. The horse was named Jack. He was about 3 1/2 yrs. old. He followed me back like an obedient pup. I got him back in the pasture and secured the gate. I rubbed his forehead a few more times and climbed onto the four-wheeler. I could hear Jack whinnying loudly and felt bad for him. He was just starved for attention. The lady that owned him wasn’t real nice or, I may have asked if I could come visit Jack from time to time. It would have satisfied my horse-craziness and, Jack wouldn’t be so lonely.
Once back at the cabin, my boyfriend teasingly said, “Would a million dollars pick you like that horse just did? We could go buy a lottery ticket, if that’s how it works.”
“I wish!” I laughed.
That day was one of the nicest days ever. It had started on a positive note and ended with a star-filled sky and the call of an old hoot owl in the distance. I like days like that. I don’t need a lot of excitement to satisfy me. I like the simple pleasures.
I’ve never asked for much in this life. I just want peace of mind. I have family and friends that love me and support me. I have my dogs and this little bunny that make me smile and touch my heart. I don’t need much more than that. I just wish my surgery was guaranteed to go just right so that I can continue to appreciate the present and dream about a future.